facts2

If only I had a magic wand....

If I only I had  a magic wand… … I would instantly turn myself into a more confident and less fearful person.  Someone a little more like the person I married. … I would find a way...

Write Stuff

Wednesday…Just the facts, please. (I actually got them done on WEDNESDAY!)

Fast facts is an idea copied from my friend Lisa Sanders… visit her blog here:  http://realisa.org. In honor of the season, which inside my house looks a bit like Christmas on steroids, these December ones are dedicated to the holidays. 

  1. Both kitty and I are more filled with Christmas cheer since she started using the outside as her potty.
  2. The quickest holiday (or anyday) anti-depressant in the world is my granddaughter’s laughter or her dancing which kinda go hand-in-hand.
  3. If there are Christmas cookies in the house, I will eat them and eat them and eat them, until I’m as round-bellied as a puppy.  Don’t even get me started on Christmas fudge.
  4. I believe it’s best to wrap presents the day I purchase them.  If I stockpile them to do all at once, my back gets sore and then I have to spend the entire next day just lying on the sofa and watching Christmas movies on the Hallmark channel.  On second thought…
  5. Since Christmas overindulgence has led to a tighter waistline on my big-girl jeans, I’ve been using the cooler weather and my love of Christmas lights as a motivation to ride my bike.  It does feel a little stalk-ery, though, to be skulking around at night on a bicycle.
  6. I’m one cookie away from considering elastic waist pants.
  7. 82° is too hot for Christmas.  Even in Florida.  I’m lodging a protest sit-in.  Bring your own cookies.
  8. Holiday movies are cheesy, but with enough wine they’re easy to digest.
  9. Speaking of cheese, a great way to use up the cheese platter from holiday parties is to melt it all down and make macaroni and cheese.  I can’t live on cookies alone.  Besides the fond memories will sustain me on my diet of plain lettuce after the first of the year.
  10. Is it just me do a lot of Christmas songs sound kinda dirge-y and depressing?

 

Here is the second installment of Pictures Around My House for Christmas.  This is our family tree.  It’s a lot more casual than the formal dining room tree and my favorite part  is the Dr. Suess hat topper (Max the Grinch dog used to sit on the top, now he just sits on a branch.  He’s happier there).   It’s also a very, very, very tall tree which is why there aren’t so many ornaments at the top (I’m afraid of ladders).

 

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  • Whale or Mermaid?

    Mermaid or Whale?

    I "borrowed" this from a friend. It's an email that was circulating a few years ago. Don’t know who wrote it so I can’t cite the contribution. If you find out, let me know.

    Recently in a large city in France , a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said, “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid

    or a whale?”

    A middle-aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

    To Whom It May Concern,

    Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans.) They have an active sex life, get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia . Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs.

    They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

    Mermaids don’t exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don’t have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex? Just look at them … where is IT? Therefore, they don’t have kids either. Not to mention, who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

    The choice is perfectly clear to me: I want to be a whale.

    P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and a piece of chocolate with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.

    So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.

    Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good grief, look how smart I am!"